Article

I am alone accepting the awards, the judgement or other for who I am. I have forged my backbone in hissing coals. I dappled at stewing a pot of Yankee resilience season with quarter cup German stubbornness, pinch Neanderthal wild hairs, touch miserly good will, dash volcano anger, whisk puppy patience, adequate organic procrastination; a lessor noble warped scavenger lacking arrogance would be humbled, consciously.

Laugh with me, train me. Laugh at me, train me. The gravitational pull of vital nutrients is relentless; even dreams are not spared. The jungle of lies I hack with a dull machete. I snarl at camp dog thieves prowling for a chance to taste my blood. I am a spinning glob of clay, shape me, I am a oak stump, carve me. I shall exist reminding who I am, the who created me. I am of you, embrace or discard.

Please, I beg you! Explain to me how with bit of dignity I can speak of the desperate need for love, praise, compassion, forgiveness, empathy, security. Am I not deserving of the respect to receive such minimal honor.

Success is not the same for all people. An infant seeks success like a hound on the scent trail. The infant works almost subconsciously at successfully manipulating people, life depends on it.

Some of the same techniques the infant uses to get attention as an infant will be used later at a retirement party. Why change if it works? If the infant sees Aunt Jane winning by crying or by anger; then the infant may do the same (And no one will notice.).

Rule of physics: subtraction creates a void or vacuum. The void attracts fulfillment, healing, restoration. Translation: if a child gets attention by sucking thumb or stuttering (Stuttering is a learned behavior taught by ignorant helpful adults.), any attempt to eliminate such behavior must be offset by offering a positive attention getting alternative (Psychology in the Classroom by Dreikurs). Otherwise the child may find another self detrimental habit (swearing) for getting attention (filling void).

How can I train you to be resilient? How important is resiliency in your lifetime to your success? How can I train your determination to achieve your goals? How can I train you to recognize and enjoy the benefits of closure?

It is enjoyable and thought provoking to train people. It works best if people pay something to be trained. Get skin in the game, pilgrim. Education is the foundation of civilization. It is the source of forward motivation. Those who prevent open education are evil cowards.

One aspect of training whoever is to recognize or acknowledge their present “situation”. Situation is not quite the best word “state of being”? Ignore food, shelter or? Dreikurs calls attention to: 1. getting attention, 2. having power, 3. seeking revenge, 4. withdrawal. A ten to forty minute discussion should indicate which number is correct. Often the reaction within oneself to another will indicate the number without discussion. Number four is the most difficult to train plus the failure of others who tried.

1. Stop conflict immediately.
2. Seek respect and discussion for each point of view.
3. Accomplished trust and sincerity.
4. Acknowledge problem.
5. Define trigger points.
6. Discuss solutions.
7. If the problem is #3 a solution to #1 won’t help much.
8. Usually there is more than one problem to solve for more than one person.
9. Training that is best for the individual is generally best and cheapest for society.